It's finally happened...

 

Yep, I'm pregnant!

We're super excited and can almost hardly believe it at the same time. I took a pregnancy test last Tuesday thinking it would end up just like all the rest - negative. I was quite shocked when it actually showed that wonderful little "pregnant" on it. I immediately burst into tears (for joy of course). I called Jaren and he was quite in shock. The conversation went something like this:

 

Me: Hi honey! Do you have a minute?

Jaren: Um, well...sure I have a minute.

Me: I can call back if you're too busy. (I wanted his full attention!)

Jaren: No it's okay, I have a minute. What's up?

Me: Well, I took a pregnancy test this morning...(hint hint)

Jaren: And... (no inclination as to what I was hinting at)

Me: It was positive. I think I'm pregnant.

Jaren: Wow. Really? That's good.....hmm.

Me: Well, I just was so excited I wanted to call and tell you.

Jaren: Okay. Well I love you sweetie. I'll talk to you later.

 

How's that for disappointing! I was a little bugged. About 10 minutes later he called back saying he was on his way home. He had taken the day off to just spend with me. I asked him about his reaction later and he said he was just in shock because he had given up hope that it would ever happen. As soon as he came home he took me straight to the doctor's office to get a blood test. He didn't believe the stick. We didn't get the results until the next morning. I was trying to wait patiently for the doctor's office to call with the results. Jaren called at about 8:30 am to see if I had called them. I told him no and he said to call immediately and call him back! Apparently his whole office now knew and were also waiting for the results. I did call and found out the results were positive! I admit I was actually worried they would be negative.  I called him back and he was actually excited on the phone this time.

 

When he came home from work later that day he had this beautiful bouquet of flowers. What a great husband!

 

He's been so sweet ever since we found out. He's called me during the day just to check and see how I'm doing. He now tells me to be careful when I go somewhere. My favorite was when we drove 2 hours to our last foster parent training session on Saturday and were early so we were sitting in the car waiting. I had to get out and stretch my legs so I told him I was going to take a little walk (thinking just around the parking lot). His response was "Don't go too far." How funny! He's very protective now and it's really cute.

 

He's convinced we're having a boy! I secretly think it is too but won't believe it until I see the ultrasound in a few months. He talks about the baby as a him and not as it. When I referred to it as "the baby" the other day he said, "He has a name! It's Blake." Yes, if it's a boy we will be naming him Blake. It's Jaren's dad's name and Jaren's middle name. When we had just returned from our honeymoon he informed me that our first son would be named Blake and that it came with the package. :)

 

A bit of info: I'm between 6 and 7 weeks along. My due date is April 19th. I haven't really had "morning" sickness but rather I just feel gross most of the day. There haven't been any mad dashes to the bathroom though so that's nice. Maybe I'll get lucky and it will stay that way. Other than that I've been super tired yet struggle to sleep soundly at night (even without a nap during the day), I'm thirsty ALL the time, my bladder feels like it has shrunk to the size of a pea and food is just gross...even sweets (which I try to avoid).

 

Every time one of my symptoms hits me I honestly get a little excited and feel grateful because it means that I am actually pregnant. I guess seven years of struggling to get pregnant will make you feel that way when it finally happens.

 

By the way, we still plan on becoming foster parents with the intent to adopt. We should be completely finished submitting everything within the next week or so and it will just be a matter of reports written then getting approved by the state. Hopefully we'll have kids in our home by October. We really feel that Heavenly Father withheld children from us until the right time when we decided on adoption. And now that we are so close to getting kids and are committed to that path, he's finally blessing us with a baby. The Lord has a time and season for everything. I'm so grateful for the wonderful 9 years Jaren and I have had together and will always cherish that time. We're so excited for this new chapter in our lives and look forward to the excitement of being pregnant, welcoming new children into our home, and eventually bringing a baby into this world!

We are truly blessed!  

Foster to Adopt

BEWARE: This is a long post. Sorry, there's a lot to say!

MUCH has happened since my last post. So many unexpected changes and unexpected roads we've taken. A few have heard the news but I decided to finally make the big announcement...we're going to adopt. We're going a different route than just adopting a brand new baby from an adoption agency. We are in the process of completing certification to become foster parents in the state of Texas. Our plan is to eventually adopt some kids that come into our home.

FYI: This does not mean in any way that we have given up on having children of our own. We just feel this is what we're supposed to do at this time.

What made us decide to do this you may ask? Well, we have talked about this before in our marriage. Mostly Jaren would ask what I thought about adopting kids in the Child Protective Services (CPS)program and me thinking that would be way too overwhelming and a lot of work my answer was generally a flat out "NO". Jaren's older sister and brother-in-law have fostered and/or adopted 9 children aside from the two they already have. I certainly don't plan on that many but it's been amazing to see these kids and the family dynamic in their home. I didn't see these kids when they first came to their new home but heard about the difficulties (an understatement). These kids have changed a lot and are happy. It's so amazing to see how fostering or adoption of these kids coming from broken homes can save their lives and give them wonderful opportunities and a safe, happy environment to grow up in.

A couple of months after visiting his sister and her family for the holidays, Jaren got an overwhelming impression and desire to foster/adopt some children. He was driving out of town and called me with a very serious question of how I would feel about it. This was the first time he asked me that I felt it was right for us and at this particular time. It was one of those rare times when you feel the Lord has sent you to a specific place at a specific time with a very specific purpose. Thank goodness Jaren's sister was there to help us get to the right people to start this process. She's been a huge help and supporter calling us every so often to see how things are going and make sure we're doing alright in the process. The process has been a roller coaster and there have been some big changes.

One huge change is that we bought a house. We were absolutely not planning on it nor were we very happy about it because we don't plan to stay in Texas very long but there were absolutely no homes for rent here. None. We know we are going to need more space than an apartment so we ended up purchasing a home. It was a big risk and we may even end up losing money on it when we sell. It is $400 a month more than our apartment (which was a lot already) and we've been fixing it up and repainting everything since we moved in. This has been a huge hold up. We can't get certified until the house is done and our inspections are completed. It's coming along though.

Other things that have been or will soon be part of this process: buying a minivan, buying beds and other bedroom furniture, collecting toys and books, child-proofing our home, garage, and backyard, finding schools, doctors, and dentists, making daily schedules, becoming CPR certified, and most of all, mentally preparing for the fact that we will have kids soon. Since it's just been the two of us for the last 9 years I think this is going to be a HUGE adjustment. Worth it, but difficult too.

We are hoping to foster/adopt a set of siblings (2 or 3). For security reasons and per the state of Texas, we won't be allowed to post pictures of the kids on the internet while we foster them. I probably won't be able to post much about the kids other than "they've arrived" so please be patient. When the time is right and we get to adopt them, we'll introduce them to you as our children. I'll try to still post about Jaren and I and general things that are happening but they won't be specific to the children.

We have definitely felt the Lord through this process. We are human so we quite often question why we're doing this or do we really want to do this? We always know it's what we're supposed to do so we keep going. The adversary has been working against us. I am grateful he hasn't hindered us more but I feel the Lord wants us to be done and ready at a certain time (which is getting very close) so He's been helping us along. When I told my mom our decision to do foster/adopt, she e-mailed me with a quote she found:

"To every man there comes in his lifetime that special moment when he is figuratively tapped on the shoulder and offered the chance to do a very special thing, unique to him and fitted to his talent; what a tragedy if that moment finds him unprepared or unqualified for the work which would be his finest hour." - Winston Churchill   

I know this will be our finest work on this earth, to raise children. I pray for the strength to make it through! Thank you to all of our family and friends who have shown us so much support. We love you!

Happy birthday!

Yesterday was Jaren's birthday! That old man turned 32 years old. :) When Jaren and I were first married, he told me how he didn't really care for birthdays. They just weren't a big deal to him. That was NOT the case in my family. The birthday boy or girl got special treatment on their big day which included but was not limited to their favorite breakfast, favorite dinner, cake and ice cream, and presents! I've tried to do this for Jaren every year we've been together but he just never seemed that excited about it. I think the last couple of years having fun kid themed birthday parties changed his mind. He commented a few weeks ago how sad he was that he wouldn't get to have a kid party this year because we don't have any kids or friends with kids in Texarkana. So I had to really try hard to make his birthday special.

Aside from his favorite meals, I made a birthday cake and got ice cream. I called his supervisor at work and asked if I could bring in the cake and ice cream as a surprise and share it with everyone in the office. At the specified time, I brought everything in and got it set up in the conference room where all of Jaren's co-workers were gathering. Jaren was told they were having a meeting at the last second so he showed up when everyone was there. He had no idea what was going on until he walked in and saw me and everyone started singing "Happy Birthday". He immediately made his way towards me with the biggest smile on his face I've ever seen. It was one of those sweet moments that you can see how genuinely happy and special that person feels. It made his day.

Later on we had his favorite dinner and sparkling cider before I left to Sweet Adelines rehearsal. I would have stayed but he was more than happy to spend some much needed time at home just doing whatever he wanted for a couple of hours. When I came home he was pretty tired so we read scriptures and I gave him a massage. It was completely innocent people. He just wanted his sore back and legs massaged (that's what happens whenever he takes the Army physical fitness test which he did last weekend). He was out like a light in no time.

I'm pretty sure he enjoyed his day. I asked him about whether or not he was starting to like birthdays and with a smile he said "they're growing on me." It only took 9 years!

Happy birthday to my wonderful husband!

Dancin' Fools

Jaren and I were lucky enough to be told we were driving our youth to Standards Night in Shreveport, LA (about an hour away) last night. Since the stake is so spread out, it's hard for them to have dances and stake youth activities very often. They decided to have a 6 hour event that started at 3:00 in the afternoon. This was the spiritual Standards Night portion. They then fed the kids "dinner" which the kids LOVED because it was a huge waffle bar that also included bacon and hash browns. Then the dance started...

I never really loved going to stake dances as a youth because they just weren't fun. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one that felt that way. Well, last night was the most fun I have EVER had at a youth dance! I do think that was partly because I got to dance with my sweetie all night long! :) The leaders really made this a fun dance though. The DJ was awesome playing all current music with some exceptions like "YMCA" and "Cotton-Eye Joe" that are a youth dance tradition. I never really liked it when the DJ played a bunch of popular '80s songs at the dances.

Here are some of the things that made it really fun for the youth and leaders. A Wii was set up with Just Dance 3 and a large screen and projector. They had everyone participate dancing along for about 4-5 songs throughout the night. When the DJ played "All the Single Ladies", the stake president's wife threw out a bunch of ring pops. We had a couple of good swing songs, some hoedown and the thing the youth loved the most were the many, many line dances. The stake president's wife was up on stage leading the line dances or getting group dance activities going.

I was told by the stake YW president that at one dance they tied string across the room above the dance floor then held the end of a toilet paper roll and sent it flying over the string. The youth would then grab it and throw it back over creating this huge toilet paper canopy. The youth also toilet papered themselves and each other. If I am ever in a calling that has a say in the planning of youth dances, I will definitely use many of these ideas! Jaren and I were completely sweaty, out of breath and aching by the end of the night! Maybe next time there is a stake youth dance, we'll just volunteer to drive instead of being told. :)

The only downer was how late we got home after dropping youth off (11:00 pm) and how tired we were the next morning for church. It was worth it though!